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If a multibillion-dollar company started a frack pit fire in your backyard that burned uncontrollably for five days and killed one person, what would you consider fair compensation? A stable of miniature horses? An all-you-can-eat shrimp dinner served on Drake’s private jet? One large pizza AND a two-liter beverage? Strike that last one; maybe we’re just getting greedy.
As The Philadelphia Daily News explains, “Scores of neighbors have complained about polluted drinking water or foul odors or ailing pets and livestock, of headaches and nausea and skin rashes.”
So, in response to this barrage of accusations, Chevron has gifted 100 residents of Bobtown with a limited-time offer for a free “Special Combo” Pizza–one large pizza and a two-liter drink, to be redeemed before May 1st.
The bizzare coupons came attached to a more standard letter of apology, in which Chevron states that it:
recognizes the effect this has had on the community. We value being a responsible member of this community and will continue to strive to achieve incident-free operations. We are committed to taking action to safeguard our neighbors, our employees, our contractors and the environment…
Chevron recognizes the effect this has had on the community. We value being a responsible member of this community and will continue to strive to achieve incident-free operations. We are committed to taking action to safeguard our neighbors, our employees, our contractors and the environment…
Look, Chevron, I get it. Pizza is great. It’s a perfect combination of all the best foods, but not even the most blissful of carb comas will make consumers easily forget your cavalier attitude towards the dangers of fracking.
Pizza–especially Pennsylvanian pizza–is an unimaginably insulting response to a disaster that caused loss of life and great peril to a community. Pizza is what you give your buddies after they help you move, not how you distract a community from your unconscionable business practices.
It’s time for Chevron consumers to give the company a pizza–a pizza their mind. See what I did there?
Agencies/Canadajournal
